Wednesday, January 26, 2011

To my wife

Hi Guys, If you didnt already know my wife passed away yesterday fighting this Cancer and my girl cheated death twice. Know this all the nurses and doctors were the best I have seen and they put her in the best suite and what a view of downtown. You should have seen the glow in her eyes when we held hands and watch the sunset. Man that was priceless. I am not bitter my wife is gone cause I know she is with our Lord and loved ones. I saw it myself. I made the choice for thr doctors to release my tulip. She would have done the same for me. I didnt tell you guys last night when I was in bed and my daughter was sleeping with me and I couldnt sleep cause I kept smelling her. I was in pitch black and I kept saying bebe where are you??? I felt her! All this support and prayers is all she was striving for. You guys dont know our privite moments when we would not say anything but just talking with our minds and laughing. At her last moments when I made the final decision that Renee went out with no pain and was a soft exhale. I kissed my tulip all over and gave her my butterfly kisses on her nose. Man her smell of love was and is still intoxicating and drives me crazy even now. I just welded my wedding ring to my finger! I will make her spirit live forever so help me God!

Sunday, January 23, 2011

My Wife

Hi Im Renees husband Chris and I will be posting updates for my wife from now on. The latest on her condition is that her heatlh has taken a turn for the worse. She is very weak and it is hard for her to think clearly anymore. She is the toughest person I have ever met and I am lost without her. I have taken a leave of absense from work to be by her side from here on no matter what. There has been overwhelming support from family, my mom which rae sees as her mother, Janet and George, Mrs. Caster, My aunt Betty, Jessica her sister and many more. I have never had more faith in God and what his plans are for my wife. I told rae(renee) that our fathers must be starting bar fights in heaven and the Lord needs her to settle them down. I am trying to hold it together for my wife and kids but man it is overwhelming and I never tell my feelings but I can hear rae tell me "I need to update my blog" so here I am cause I know her friends and family that can't see her or talked to her are worried. She is in good hands, I already told her that I will be at her side and melt with her. Isnt that what marriage is all about? Thick and thin, whatever happens to be at eachothers side? She has taught me to be the man that I am and noone will ever take her place ever! She is MY HEART and you need your heart to stay alive. Just remember Renee's favorite verse: Be still and know that I am God, maybe this will bring you comfort.....


More to come I promise.